Of duck fears and mischivous friends
by The Darker Side Of Music
Summary: what do you get when you cross a sleep deprived me and a duck fearing jace? a certain geeky vampire taking the p*ss :). not set anywhere in particular in the books but after Simon becomes a vampire and before jace gets messed up in the head. not the best writer so bear with me.


"DID YOU SERIOUSLY? DID YOU SERIOUSLY JUST CALL STAR WARS AND STAR TREK STUPID!? IN THE SAME SENTENCE! CLARY, MAKE YOUR PET SHADOWHUNTER TAKE IT BACK NOW!" Simon shouted, turning away from Jace who was sat cleaning a seraph blade smirking at the amusement he got from Simon's fan girl style rant on why Star Wars and Star Trek are the 'back bone of Sci-fi'.

Not even looking up from the blade Jace asked "Clary would you mind explaining to rat boy that even though I agree a lightsaber would be a very lovely weapon to have in my possession, both Star Wars and Trek possess many flaws and are just too prominent to be dismissed as lightly as they are."

"I am not getting involved with this" Clary quickly and sternly stated making it clear to them both not to make her choose sides. "And to prove this I shall be up in one of the spare rooms until you too stop arguing." Clary picked up the books she found on true folklore and fake and left the kitchen disappearing into the Institute halls.

"Jace, THIS IS WAR!" Simon declared in a childlike way staring at him, eyes narrowed and pointing his hand at jace before quickly rushing from the kitchen, a few seconds later jace heard the front door pulled open and slam closed. Deciding the blade was clean, Jace headed down towards the training room to pass the time whilst waiting for this 'war' to begin.

_'Ha what could he possibly do? Get his little yodi plushie and hit me with it'? _

* * *

Several hours later Jace was walking back up to his room for a shower, Alec was already in the training room when Jace had got there and after hearing about Simon's threats (which he found hilarious) they had sparred together till they both ached and Alec had declared that Jace's body odour could compare to the foul retched breath of a greater demon after Isabelle's cooking.

As Jace reached his door and a chill went down his spine, ignoring it he entered his room expecting the bed to be his usual white sheets perfectly made, his walls pristine and plain and the room to look its usual clear self...

The room looked nothing like his room.

His eyes widened and his heart jumped into his throat, the bed was ill made and instead of white it had yellow cartoon ducks all over. His walls had many menacing pictures of a giant inflatable duck in some harbour, worse of all was a framed photo of a duck placed on a table next to the door. It had sharpened teeth in its bill and a look of malice and mischief in its narrowed eyes. On the photo was a note that read' 1st attack underway first wave complete, beware golden boy they are attracted to your yellow hair ;) '. That clued Jace in as to which enemy of his had done this. Jace's blood boiled.

"YOU BLOODSUCKING RAT! COME OUT HERE DAYLIGHTER AND I'LL SHOW YOU HOW WAR IS FOUGHT!" Jace screamed with anger that the geeky vampire had corrupted his own personal Sanctuary, he was not happy at all.

With his patience worn thin Jace decided to go and find Simon so he could hurt him sooner rather than later, backing out the door and closing it he turned to leave but was confronted by the duck from the photo. It looked truly more horrifying than in the photo, the glint in its plastic black eyes reminded jace of a demon watching its prey. And he was trapped by it. He was stuck between a duck and a room full of duck. The situation was truly humiliating. The fear of been found like this backed up against a door frame and the fear of the ducks kept rising in him until it just came out in one single frustrated scream.

The single scream was enough to attract even Church to see what made the all mighty Jace (he who acted like fear was a foreign concept) scream.

"Jace what's wrong?!" Clary was first to find him, caught staring into the eyes of the toy. "Clary, don't move I fear it's a demon possessed duck toy." Jace whispered, eyes not moving from the ducks. Just then Magnus and Alec came running out of a room from down the hall not giving clary a chance to think of a reply to the bizarre remark.

"Jace what happened?!" Alec ran up to him checking him for wounds or any sign of trauma before Magnus pulled him away and pointed at the duck.

"A DUCK! You screamed like bloody murder and scared me half to death over A DUCK!" Alec yelled before turning to Magnus and leaning his head on his boyfriend's shoulder. "I give up, this is beyond stupid he's one of the best and he can't handle a duck." Magnus merely looked amused at both of them "there there Alexander head up or you'll get all glittery." Alec simply walked over to a chair and sat leaning his head against the wall as Magnus turned to jace. "And you, a toy duck? Oh Jace you're really are as bad as William. Honestly If there was any doubt over relations, this eradicates them."

Church then made his presence known to the young group by hissing at the toy from behind clary. We eyed up the toy like it was an enemy Church crouched forward and pounced onto the duck, one paw landing on the face and the other on the belly pressing a button making it quack an evil laughter that could only be described as Donald's ducks; Church just hissed at it again.

"AHH! Church kill it, kill it!" Jace said trying to hide behind clary like a she was a shield.

"Ahem no. the duck is mine now." Magnus declared reaching down and easily taking the toy off Church to the feline's dislike. "Now he shall be called malec the duck and he shall stand guard at my apartment so if you dare turn up uninvited like you Nephilim tend to do from time to time he will greet you."

"I'd rather you burn it" Jace murmured into Clary's hair then spoke up "fine just get out of our home." he said strongly, trying to save what pride he had left among his peers and came out from behind Clary.

"Alright" Magnus shrugged and turned to Alec "and you, feel free to come round this evening and we can carry on from where we left off" he said slyly with a wink and before anyone could voice there disgust, he was off.

"Um Jace" Alec asked getting up from the chair "Why didn't you go in your room instead of backing up against the door?"

Clary answered for Jace "It would be like Simon to go over the top, bet you 5 dollars that Jace's room is covered in ducks" Alec was not convinced.

"It's only been a two or three hours, he wouldn't be able to do it so quickly… you're on."

Opening Jace's door they saw the amounts of yellow and all the cartoon ducks. Clary turned to Alec with a Cheshire grin "Told you Alec, pay up". Alec grumbled about stupid speedy vampires as he handled over the money.

Clary and Alec went straight to removing the photos and returning the old bed sheets even church pitched in shredding the cat height pictures down. Jace was able to come more than 5 steps in the room within the hour. Doing final checks for any leftover pictures they heard a voice by the door.

"I see you torn down my artwork, Your move golden boy".

They all turned to see Simon standing smug in the doorway, Jace stalked towards Simon grabbing him by the collar of his T-shirt.

"Listen here Daylighter I hope you keep your Yodi and Spork plushies under lock and key because I'll enjoy the challenge of taking them both from you and letting church maul them all for your dead eyes to see." Jace spoke quickly with venom laced into the words.

Simons face had paled from fear but his inner geek flared with rage over his memorabilia like a mother protecting her child "There called YODA and SPOCK for a start and they are cloth figurines NOT plushies! And don't you dare give them to your creature of a cat!"

Jace and Simon stood glaring at each other silently, standing close enough to throw a punch; the tension was so thick a single spark could set them both off. Alec and Clary merely looked at each other and silently agreed in mutual interest of living to watch instead of trying to get them both to calm down.

Inevitably Simon buckled under Jace's glare and escaped by slipping out his t-shirt and ran out the door as fast as he could screaming as he went, Jace was hot on his tail yelling "it's not over yet Daylighter! GET BACK HERE! THIS IS WAR!

* * *

One week later

Simon walked into his room feeling tired from been a nocturnal creature trying to live the 'diurnal' way. Just as he was going to collapse on his bed to rest he saw a letter and a turned down photo frame on the shelf his memorabilia normally sat on. Simon's eyes went wide with fear. He tore open the letter and read it quickly, it read:

_Dear geeky Daylighter _

_When you reach the Institute , they shall be hid and I shall release Church._

_May the odds be not in your favour._

_From your beloved local shadowhunter_

_Jace_

_P.S. Clary made me watch the hunger games hence the reference, please don't think I am making an effort to understand your nonsense ramblings._

Before the letter could hit the ground Simon looked at the photo in the down turned frame only to turn and run double speed to the Institute. In the frame was a photo of Jace wearing a malicious grin of revenge and Church was in cat carrier trying to reach out with his paw to claw at what Jace was holding just out of reach.

He held Simon's plush Yoda and Spock.

* * *

MALEC THE DUCK - the malec shippers personal mascot and protector XD and he shall be making regular guest appearances in any other stories i do.

and reviews are appreciated by me (for my work is loved) and by my friends and family ( they happy when I am happy over my work been loved)


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